NOTES TO SELF

We finally finished having the interior of our house repainted.  My biggest project was my craft room.  It forced me to purge and re-organized.  It also helped me find some long-lost treasures.  I don't want to lose these again, so a few things I ran across I needed to post because I don't want them to ever be lost again. 

These won't mean much to you, but they mean the world to me.  So here goes (in no particular order):

#1 - Decades ago while living in San Francisco, I use to always look forward to reading Herb Caen's column.  It was a meandering column about life in SFO.  This particular paragraph came from sometime in 1985'ish and reads:

"I was about to say, "It's been years since I heard a good toast," when Irene Marks remembered this from out salad daze:  "Here's to the roses and lilies and bloom, you in my arms and I in your room, a door that is locked, a key that is lost, a bird and a bottle and a bed badly tossed, and a night that is 50 years long."  The old-timers did have a certain lavender style."

Lovely, isn't it?

#2 - Back in my high-school years, one of my first jobs was at a restaurant in Midwest City, OK called "Joshua's."  It was back in the late 70's and a time when "Fern Bars" were becoming the vogue.....you (those of us old enough) remember:  stained glass, ferns, old/worn signs.  In the restaurant, there was a framed saying and whenever I stopped and read it, I thought it was written expressly for my mother.  Thank goodness I had the sense to jot it down.  Through the years I had remembered a few of the lines, but when cleaning out my craft room, I ran across it.  Thank Goodness!!!!  To me, this was one part of my mother's life I will always remember.  I wish I could credit the author.  It's like it was written about Momma:

I used to love to hear the
   whir
   of Mom's old treadle
   machine...
With her feet and fingers
   flying
   she could whip up
   anything!
And many times at
   bedtime
   we'd announce without a
   warning
   "Hey Mom! I need a
   costume
      for our pageant in
      the morning!

#3 - Oh!  This one goes back even further!  There were two fellows who were friends back in Midwest City.  Drama friends.  And oh so funny!!!  These were the kind of guys and you have to think, "Where the heck did they come up with this?!!!"  So unless you knew them or someone like them you may wonder "why does Kay think this is so funny?"  Personally, I think it was brilliance.  We all had the whole thing memorized.  Forty-something years later I still get a kick out of it (oh, and by the way, David Singer also got a hoot out of one of "The Millionaire's" beneficiaries name which was "Myra Putnam."  He just thought that was the quintessential black & white television character's name!)

So, here goes:

1 hen
2 ducks
3 squawking geese
4 limerick oysters
5 corpulent porpoises
6 pairs of Don Alberto tweezers
7 thousand Macadonians dressed in full battle array
8 brass monkeys from the sacred crypts of Egypt
9 sympathetic, apathetic, diabetic old men on roller skates with a definite mark of propensity towards procrastination and sloth
10 lyrical, spherical, diabolical demons of the deep who stall in the quo of the quay of the quivey while eating a pepperoni pizza pie with persimmons and pastrami all at the same time.

GENIUS!!!!

One last gem to offend people in this politically-correct nation we've turned into.  Thanks to Archie Bunker in "All in the Family:"

re: an upcoming political election's "Balanced Ticket"

Archie:

"Now that's what I call a balanced ticket.  You gotta Jew and a WOP and a Mick and a regular white guy.

Feldman: You know these people are good with money.

The Wop: can keep an eye on Feldman.  The one thing about those Italians: when you get an honest one, you really have something there.

The Mick: Can make sure the graft is spread equally.

The Regular American: is good for TV, they make the rest of the guys look respectable."


And now these gems go back to bed, probably until the day I die.